yup

Aku rasa aku nak mati. And lepas 'mati' tu, ‘aku’ akan hidup dalam loop of memories macam mana     kita     hidup selama ni sama-sama.  Just anything and everything yang kita buat sama-sama. It's the simplest thing. Makan kat Khulafa time tengahhari. Makan kat Seksyen 6. Duduk sama-sama. Pilih meja. Order air. And saya akan stare kat muka awak. Then kita sembang. Pasal macam-macam. Rindu pergi kedai runcit awak. Beli air mineral awak. Just the simplest things yang kita buat. Saya rindu. Dan saya sakit. Hati saya. So saya wish saya 'mati'. Dan kekal hidup dalam memori tu. Hidup macam tu. Everyday. Dengan awak. On loop. Then bila malam mungkin kita pergi makan icity. Or pecal lele. Dua-dua saya tak suka sangat. Tapi sebab dengan awak. Saya nak sangat semua tu sekarang. Then on the way balik. Saya peluk awak. Dan tak pernah risau tentang kehilangan semua tu masa tu. Padahal sekarang... Aku tak tau kenapa hari ni. SUMPAH. s...

4.30am 1 January 2019 Happy new year 2019 Although things didn’t go as planned for tonight for new year celebration, Yet aku tak rasa .. like aku lose something or rugi or apa apa Unlike when i was 15 or so, always rasa for new year you have to be somewhere cool under the fireworks. Now i just need to be beside someone worthy And we can spend our new years eve doing laundry kat dobi Watching fireworks from afar. Rolled the window down, snapped a few blurry low quality pics of the beautiful fire painting in the sky of 2019 And i do feel old. Nope aku probably have nothing ‘deep’ to write tonight